It’s been nearly a year since I had Edie and Mabel and I’m torn between saying the time has flown over and dragged by. The days have often felt so long (not forgetting quite a few nights) but when I look back to them been born, it feels like only yesterday.
I’m not quite sure what I expected from motherhood but whatever it was, I never imagined this. Being a twin mum hasn’t been as difficult as I imagined at all but getting used to the idea that my life will never be the same has been quite a challenge for me.
I don’t think you could say I suffered with postpartum depression because I never felt that unhappy about my life but I have desperately been mourning the loss of ‘the old me.’
I wasn’t expecting to get pregnant when I did, nor did I ever expect I’d have twins and I admitted in my early pregnancy posts how I struggled to get used to the idea of the fact I was going to become a mum.
Don’t get me wrong, I would never change having the girls and I love our little family life but gosh do I miss been able to just nip out to the shops, or go pop to the Scream Factory site and see how the guys are getting on. I miss feeling like my old self too… I struggle to find the time to make it the gym and my hormones – despite a year on are still all over the place. My hair is constantly greasy and even though I haven’t put on any weight, my body shape has changed so lots of my clothes don’t fit.
Over the past couple of months, I seem to have been moaning more about it and I found myself searching pinterest for ‘ways to feel better postpartum.’ Everything seems to cover the first few weeks after birth but not a year on. Moaning doesn’t do anyone any good so I’ve been trying to make an effort to feel better about myself again.
I started by making myself a list and then I’ve slowly been ticking off things on there and trying to squeeze them into my daily routine. So I thought I’d share what I’ve been doing here, in case anyone else felt the same because it’s always good to know you’re not alone in situations like this.
Some of them are achievable straight away, whereas others on my list might take a little saving for but they’re short term and long term goals that I’m working towards which I think will help me feel a little bit more like me again.
- Go for a walk each day with no babies and no technology.
- Use the time I have more efficiently
- Write more conversational pieces on my blog again
- Go to the gym at least once a week
- Workout daily
- Take better care of my skin and try have a facial
- Make time to go to a spa
- Buy some new better fitting clothes
- Drink more water and eat better
- Remember to take vitamins daily
- Ask family to have the girls more
- Have my teeth whitened
- Go to bed earlier and read